The Allure of Poker: A Double-Edged Sword

Poker has a mesmerizing allure, almost hypnotic. It’s like a siren’s call, drawing us into a strange and costly world where we often feel like we’re in a trance. It takes years to adjust our thinking and start turning a profit, making the path to that coveted Maserati anything but straightforward.swerte99

Meeting Big Nick: A Mentor in the Shadows

I met Big Nick in 2014. He managed two 1-2 tables at a dive bar in Hell’s Kitchen, where I spent several months honing my skills. I started out as a tournament player, but on the cash side, I was still a novice—unfamiliar with the gritty, high-stakes underground scene, the dealers who skimmed excessively, the steep rakes, and the wild 15x opens. Back then, as now, NYC poker enthusiasts fueled the low-stakes games. Fortunately for them, poker has a bit of luck involved. Even if they played poorly, these players could still take unconventional approaches and find success.swerte99

Secrets of the Underground

In a gritty, almost rebellious way, illegal NYC poker games remain strangely captivating: imagine enticing massage girls, porn, pot vapes, sticky poker chips, and the occasional raid. Despite the allure, coaches often overlook that this kind of poker is far from authentic. Underground games are a far cry from the elite TV poker or public card rooms where a significant portion of pro players are well-versed in concepts like ranges. True poker requires genuine skill and intelligence. And yes, I’m a bit of a purist (feel free to dislike me for it). I firmly believe in the essence of real poker, even with the presence of wild players who manage to win big at every stake and the dazzling anarcho-innovators who continually redefine the game.

Playing for Profit vs. Playing for Fun

Remember, if you’re aiming to make a living from your poker winnings, you’re playing a different game entirely. Your “decision trees” won’t match those of casual players who are in it for the thrill and bet accordingly. Many casual players show up, get stoned, and enjoy a night out—escaping from their daily routines and paying a hefty rake for a night of leisurely entertainment poker. For them, the excitement of winning is secondary.swerte99

The Tribal Nature of Low-Stakes Cash Games

As poker expert Ed Miller points out, low-stakes cash games are often tribal. Weak and predictable play becomes entrenched and copied. (New York, in particular, is known for its donating players, with profit potential high once you master the unpredictable nature of the hobbyist mindset.) Most of us don’t have casinos nearby, so we adapt. However, if you’re training in underground games, make sure to engage in as many pots as possible with the small group of strong, skilled players (usually tighter and more successful). These players will challenge you, push your limits, and help you grow.swerte99

A Trip Down Memory Lane

Big Nick’s place had become quite successful, although I had long moved on. He had expanded to more tables and more days of operation. At one point, he missed me and reached out via text. As soon as I stepped into the venue, I could sense how much I had changed. Nick had changed too—his once lean frame now strained by the pressures of running a bustling operation and the fallout from a recent divorce. He showed me around, but his eyes betrayed his fatigue. At 48, he looked weary and disillusioned in a world he had presumably built with passion.swerte99

The Weight of Dishonor

I felt out of place there. Even the stylish lighting over the table seemed bleak. One player, running a godlike 70% range at ½, quickly racked up several thousand dollars. His meticulous chip arrangement, cold demeanor, and robotic betting made me uneasy. I struggled with my emotions (apologies to Angelo). A single word kept flashing in my mind: dishonored. This game seemed to disrespect poker’s complexity, its potential for structured yet intimate combat, and its ability to offer solace to countless players.swerte99

Confronting Personal Demons

Destiny can be a cruel joke. At one point, Nick’s cocky player with his 70% range cracked my kings. Tilt took over, and I could feel my frustration consuming me. I despised this player with his quick chip handling and smug silence. I loathed myself for letting it affect me so deeply, for the anger I felt, and for the self-loathing that followed. My coach and I had been diligently working on mental game issues, and yet, here was this elegant structure of personal growth collapsing around me.swerte99

Insights from a Fellow Player

Later that night, Luka the pro messaged me: “Eileen, the way you describe the lucky player and the whole scene is rooted in mental triggers related to justice, equality, and entitlement—concepts that serious players must ignore or even scorn. Those of us who really understand the game can’t afford to be distracted by such things.” It hit hard. I’ve spent countless hours playing live poker with indifference and composure. But at Nick’s, I regressed.swerte99

The Haunting Legacy of Nick’s Place

We make our plans, and fate has its own sense of humor. Poker certainly has a dark side that goes beyond just bad beats. Some gaming environments are inherently grim, much like the eerie Beverly Hills mansions from my childhood. In the end, nothing could erase the haunted look in Nick’s eyes. I hugged him tightly as I cashed out. As I waited for the car service in the middle of the night, I realized that Nick’s place had been a grand setup—a haunting echo from the past. A specter of something unsettling. A dybbuk.swerte99

The Dual Nature of Poker

Sad poker has a timeless quality to it. I can easily picture a 1950s back-alley Texas saloon, where the game is hostile and dull, and the lighting is equally dismal. Back then, real poker was genuinely risky; you didn’t just risk getting robbed for thrills. Despite the dangers of that era, modern poker is divided into two distinct realms: poker for enjoyment and poker for profit. These aspects are fundamentally different but also complement each other wonderfully.swerte99

Finding Your Path in Poker

If you’re aiming to navigate poker’s jazzy superhighway, start by understanding your needs. If you’re playing to unwind, embrace the dramatic clash of wills with a full heart. But if you’re serious about improving and earning, seek out players, tables, and coaches who will challenge and refine your skills quickly. They’ll help you get closer to that Nero Ribelle Quattroporte, I promise.swerte99

In the end, poker is a mirror reflecting our ambitions, our flaws, and our capacity for growth. It is both a battlefield and a sanctuary, where the stakes can change with every hand dealt. Understanding this duality is key to mastering the game and, ultimately, ourselves.swerte99